Tag: marriage

Wonderful Date

Craig is a wonderful romantic. Our babysitter is back in town now, and Craig designed a lovely date for us. We started off by going to this cute little French restaurant that we like in Old Colorado City. The cheese fondue with the wonderful French bread is to die for, and the cheesecake is sublime. After that Craig surprised me by taking me to the art gallery. He knows that’s my favorite place to be, that and the bookstore. So after we went to the art gallery he took me to a used bookstore I had never gone to before. Although I like ordering new books off of Amazon, or going to Barnes & Noble, used book stores are really cool because you can find some interesting things for good prices. He bought me four new books. One is called Unequal Childhoods, and it’s a sociology book profiling kids from different families and how they turn out differently based on upbringing and their place in society. Then he bought me The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron, and her other book The Golden Vein, or something like that. And then there’s a nice book with profiles of each woman in the Bible including those who are unnamed.

After that we went to a few stores to shop for some new glassware as some of mine has recently been broken. Unfortunately I didn’t find anything I liked so I’m probably going to have to try my luck online. But it was fun to go shopping with Craig just the same. I even got to run into Staples really quickly. I love office supply stores! They are just wonderful! All the organizers, pens, folders, special books, notebooks, Etc.

I feel so grateful to have a husband like Craig. He supports me in everything. He always shows that he loves, desires, and respects me. He surprises me with little gifts that I like. He goes out of his way to make me happy. When we moved to Colorado and I had a hard time because I was lonely and in a new environment, he went out of his way to create a home for me. He bought church pews for me to make the formal living room complete. He bought us a brand new bedroom set with all the features I could ever dream of. He bought me a vanity. He bought a shoe tree for the hall to keep our jackets and shoes in one place. He has bought me beautiful lamps and other things that really make me feel at home. Now he has bought me a new sofa as of last month. He bought me beautiful blue rugs for the floor. There’s more that I’m not even naming. He knew that I missed home and missed the wonderful little house that we built in North Carolina. So he went out of his way to make our home in Colorado perfect for me, and he has. I am so joyous in my home every way. I am so pleased with my lovely home. It makes me tremendously happy. It’s decorated how I want, and it’s comfortable for me and I think for the whole family. It has a lot of personality in it and no shortage of wonderful things. My husband is so good to me.

Our date was so nice. I’ve been having a hard time lately, which I have been fixing by taking a double dose of my meds. I was so grateful that I perked up enough to be able to go on a date. Craig always knows how to cheer me up. It’s wonderful that we’ve been married more than six years and honestly it’s still like we got married yesterday. The spark is still there. Sometimes literally. There’s a lot of static electricity around here, so when we kiss there’s usually a little bit of a zap. I still feel like a newlywed. We know each other better now, although we knew each other pretty well then. We’ve built a life together and had a child together and had so many experiences together. All of those things change a person. But we’ve grown together rather than apart, and I’m so grateful.

After going without dates for a while it felt really good to get back in the swing of things. Usually we try to go on dates at least fairly often, but with the Christmas holidays and then with our wonderful babysitter being gone for 2 weeks after that there just wasn’t really much time. Now we want to get back to our somewhat regular dates.

My handsome, loving, patient, kind man.

Developing a Gentle and Quiet Spirit

My spirit is much gentler and much quieter than it used to be. A gentle and quiet spirit in a woman is precious to God. But although I try to be gentle, sometimes I lose my temper. I don’t even try to be quiet at home. I am not even sure I am capable of being quiet!

What does it mean to have a gentle and quiet spirit? How does this pair with being a strong person, with having a strong personality, with being opinionated? Can they go together? It is such a hard issue to understand. What is wrong with a spirit that wants to do more and be more? There is a fine line between gratitude and complacency.

So far, although I am reading about it and searching scripture, the conclusions I have come to are this: do not be contentious, control your temper, and use soft words for the people around you. Perhaps being gentle and quiet has nothing to do with whether you are weak or strong, opinionated or not, or the color of your personality.

I have made so much progress on having a gentle and quiet spirit, but I have a long way to go to be pleasing to God. I focus too much on my own needs and not enough on my husband’s. I am short tempered and rash. I am too easily stressed out, instead of taking serenity from the knowledge that God is in control. My tongue is too sharp at times.

Marriage Journal

This is a lovely red journal I bought that I use to remind me to be a good wife. On each page is a verse about marriage or submission. In it I try to record daily goals for serving, respecting, loving, and honoring Craig. It really makes me think. You can’t take your husband for granted, and each day I should focus on serving my husband. He is such a blessing in my life, and he deserves the best of me. I get tired and busy and moody, and sometimes it is good to have something to remind me to prioritize my marriage.

Life Giving Home

This inspiring book by Sally Clarkson renewed the vigor with which I manage my home. I will never be a fantastic housekeeper, but I will try.

Growing up I read that the mother is the thermostat of the home. Her mood and attitude sets the tone for the rest of the household. This book more or less drives that point home. The best thing I can do as a homemaker is be gentle with the people in my home, and try to be cheery. Good homemaking is not just about having floors that are clean enough to eat off (although that’s a good thing to have), but rather it is about creating an environment that people want to dwell in.

This book also gave me a few random ideas for creating a unique, memorable environment for my family. Play music throughout the day. I asked Craig to buy me a speaker for downstairs. He got me a cool little one that changes colors. He also got me an mp3 player and sd card to go with the speaker so I could connect music.

I tried to choose a soundtrack that I thought was interesting and set a tone. I have Gregorian chants, nun choirs, and other Christian music. I also have some favorite instrumental film scores, including some dark ones. I want a house of thinking. of memory, of the surreal. I have a little Evanescence and some Apocalyptica. They make orchestral versions of rock songs.  I have some of the Lord of the Rings soundtrack on there, some a capella, and Adrian von Ziegler.

Maybe that is a little odd, but I think it sets a memorable tone for the house. 

New Furniture!

Craig has been off work from Thursday to Sunday this week. He was so sweet. He bought me a new sofa, a big sectional with an even longer chaise than what I had on the green sofa. The new one is gray and has a huge ottoman. I am so cozy on it.

The initial thought was that if I have to have the surgery that the doctor said I have to have, I will be sleeping downstairs with a cast on. The green sofa is too short for me to stretch out with a pillow and have my leg completely out straight with the cast. Realistically, if I don’t have that surgery I’ll have to have another one. Being in a two-story house, I have to pick a floor. I don’t want to be lonely all the time so I picked downstairs.

Ultimately, what confirmed our decision to get another sofa came from other factors. We could have gotten a futon for me to sleep on, although the futon we found was not very comfortable. But we realize that realistically we should have another sofa. When family comes to visit there isn’t enough room for all of us to sit down. Usually people end up sitting on dining room table chairs for most of the day. Those are nice chairs to have dinner on, but they’re much less comfortable if you’re spending an afternoon on them. Vicki and Joel, Craig’s parents, have come to visit us twice already this year and whenever they come they don’t have a good place to sit. We’re hoping that my parents will be out this year or next, and when they come they won’t have a place to sit either. We definitely feel bad when people come across the country to visit us and we don’t even have comfortable seating for them. On top of that, with the shape of the room, if you’re not sitting on the sofa there’s not really room for you to sit with the family so you have to sit behind everybody.

Besides that, we’ve been needing more seating. Now the green sofa is in the library. I have a comfortable and spacious place to sit and read, or to sit and read to Angelica. It’s still a nice sofa and there is no way that it needs to be trashed yet, so the library is a wonderful new home for it. The big, older chair that was in the library has been moved up the craft room. If I go up there to look at my poetry books I can sit down on that chair and have a perfect view of Pikes Peak while I read. So all in all it worked out.

I Met Another Headcoverer!

I was in Petsmart picking up some litter box bedding for Parsnip, when a girl stopped me and told me my veil was beautiful, and asked if I was Christian. She is too, and she wears veils to church! She’s Catholic, and in her parish headcovering is not uncommon. She said there’s even a couple of churches around here who do a Latin Mass and require women to cover. She said she’s thought about covering full time like I do, but she just isn’t sure yet. She always covers at church though.

It’s so refreshing to meet another woman who wears veils. She gave me a good recommendation for where to buy more infinity veils and mantillas, and I gave her a recommendation as well. I told her I was a Methodist and she was definitely surprised, which makes sense because headcovering is pretty uncommon among Methodists.

This may sound silly, but it warmed my heart to meet another woman who headcovers, even if she does not do it full time. I sometimes get looked at negatively for wearing veils. Some people really love my veils and I get compliments, but still many more are put off. It’s nice to see that other young women are wearing them too, and of course it is always nice to hear that someone likes my veil! My veils are beautiful to me, and it is lovely when someone else appreciates one of them.

She told me headcovering is coming back in the Catholic and Orthodox churches, and I think that is wonderful. I hope that someday more Protestants (besides just the Mennonites) will start to cover. I am in some headcovering groups online, and I know there are a few Lutherans, evangelicals, and nondemoninationals veiling now. Just not many. Headcovering is such a beautiful, reverent thing and can bring so much joy. Once upon a time everyone practiced headcovering, especially in church. Yet in so many churches, especially Protestant churches, headcovering is now eschewed. I pray this beautiful, scriptural practice is revived. But whether it is or it isn’t, I will continue to wear my veils  in obedience to the Scripture that has been laid on my heart by God. My conscience is convicted.

It just filled me with joy to meet another sister in Christ who believes in headcovering!

Coursera, Rainbow Notes

I have been dying to learn new things, and after reading a book called, “Don’t Go Back to School,” or something to that, I have decided to listen to iTunes lectures, buy textbooks, use online MOOCs and other learning programs, AND to start taking notes on what I learn so that I remember it. I have actually done a ton of nonfiction reading over the past ten years over many subjects, but for some reason as my mood swings got worse my memory got worse and I just wasn’t retaining things like I wanted to. But when I was in school, I could always retain things by taking notes. Rather than using some notebook, I am using a colorful notepad app that lets you add notes in literally any color. You choose the color you want from the color spectrum wheel. It is so bright and fun to look at my notes! I have my phone with me a lot, so I can review what I’ve learned whenever and wherever I want.

I am starting off by taking some little Coursera courses. Right now I am going through a class on gender roles in Korea. It is fascinating! I am enjoying taking notes. I have so many other courses I am going to audit as well, and so many books I am going to read. I found a really fun book online about philosophers who were unlucky, or very unskilled, in love. That should be really fun to read and learn from. I love any form of biography, I love humor, and maybe I’ll come across some philosophers I want to study in depth. Starting this week, I am really diving into things. I like to keep my mind  honed, to stay interesting, and to challenge myself. These are my goals.  I want to stay interesting for myself and my husband. I want to learn about the world for my own edification, and to broaden my horizons in my writing.  When I don’t learn anything new I start to feel so dull, and my writing feels so flat. My imagination slows. I believe that education should never stop. It enriches the soul, creates human connections, and builds character. I feel more like myself when I am studying something.

Marriage

My silence is a blue tapestry
hanging by the old runny window.
Beneath my tongue the dream
dissolves, disheveled, voiceless.

Where his feet go,
my soul follows,
swimming through the cerulean sea,
stalking through the scorching sands,
clattering through canals.

His feet make tracks on the moon,
his ambition a horse for me to ride
to some frosted paradise.

In my tapestry,
the design of a snowflake,
sublime and thick.

Christian Bookstore, Diet, Domain Name

Angelica has been going to Vacation Bible School this week. She seems to be having fun and they do nice activities. Today she got a little picture frame to take home with Legos around the border. So far though when we talked to her it doesn’t seem like she’s actually learned anything. Maybe the messages will sink in later. But we ask her what she learned about God and she’ll say well we played. Then we’ll say, what did you learn about Jesus? And she’ll say we danced.

Craig has been home for the past few days because it is the time in his rotation where he gets a few days off. So we have been spending the mornings together running errands or just enjoying some quality time before we pick up Angelica. We love the Christian bookstore we went to. So many good books! And there are a lot of homeschool supplies too.

My diet is going well, knock on wood. I think I need to cut back a little more but I am still losing weight. I am so grateful for that.

I’m trying to pick a domain name for this site. I have done a little bit of remodeling on the page, and I would like to go ahead and buy a domain and make everything complete. Plus, if I buy hosting I get more memory. And I’m running low on memory. I’m considering several options for names, but I’m open to suggestions.

I am probably overthinking it, but this is my special little space on the web and I want it to have a good name. I’m torn between something functional, like the Veiled Housewife, and something creative/poetic like October Glow. More people will find the first one, and as I write about head covering and submission sometimes it might make sense. Plus, I like reading blogs by other stay at home women, so it might be nice to be listed as one. At the same time I really like the idea of something super creative and poetic, even if it will never show up in a search engine and some people might not understand why it has the name it has.

Some ideas:

Filigree Moon

November Snow

Sapphire Sea

Pelerine Journal

Red Telephone

Glitter Ghost