I Got Screwed

Back to the oral surgeon this morning. Last night the screw that holds things in place before the tooth implant can be put in came out. Thank goodness the base in the bone was okay, but I had to get another screw. I had called the after hours line last night and they said to not worry and call to get an appointment.

Well I’m here and I’m healthy, but my gums grew in overnight. So he had to take out tissue again. Not fun. Liquid diet for a few days.

Busy Day

Maintenance is here doing a biannual check.

This morning I went to the GI doctor about the daily vomiting. He prescribed a medication that does the same thing as another medication that a different doctor has given me. I do not have high hopes for it. They also have me scheduled to stick a camera down my throat. As you can guess I am not looking forward to that.

In the meantime I might see if it is one of my other medications causing this problem. I’m on one that helps me but it may be creating the nausea. And if it is I’m going to have to go off that pill. Because daily nausea and vomiting for the foreseeable future is just not an option.

The awesome girl who does our cleaning was here today and it felt so nice to come back to the appointment and smell all the cleaning products and see the stripes in the carpet from the vacuum. So that’s probably going to be the highlight of my day.

Later on Angelica has speech and OT. Then I can finally be done. Angelica has a friend over right now and they are watching 101 Dalmatians.

Now for the ultrasound tomorrow. Yay.

Lab, Summer

This morning I finally made it to the lab to get tests done. The doctor wanted to run several tests, so they drew five vials of blood. I know from the paperwork he’s testing at least 10 things. I also had to do a test where you breathe into a bag, drink a weird drink, wait 15 minutes, and breathe into another bag. This is to test for certain stomach ulcers. I had to bring Angelica with me because this was the only morning that worked for me all week, and I couldn’t get the babysitter for today. Of course Angelica was extremely well-behaved. She asked if her Bible was allowed inside, and then brought one of her little Bibles with her to the waiting room.

I was glad that they were able to get the blood for me without too much trouble. I am usually a pretty hard stick. The first time she tried she had to dig around and it didn’t work. She had that long needle just moving around. I hate that feeling. But on the second try she got it on the other arm.

Shortly after I came home the really nice girl who cleans for us came.

Angelica has been playing non-stop with a friend since we got home. We got home before noon. We’re approaching five. She’s been playing all day.

School starts in a few weeks! We are coming up on August and everything is getting so real. It felt pretty real when we toured the school and then when Angelica had her evaluation and Craig and I did the parent interview, but it’s amazing to think that before I know it I will be dropping her off. Time is running out.

This spider is really pissing me off. It keeps trying to spread its silk in the air around my back porch swing. That’s not okay. I keep finding fresh string but I can’t seem to find the spider himself.

It is some sort of weird spider season. When I look out the front windows I can see spider threads flying down the street. Some species of spider do disperse their babies that way. The little babies propel with silk and just glide through however many feet or even miles they can before landing on something to build a nest. I just really don’t want to get one stuck on me. I’ll have a heart attack.

Something is Not Right

I got into a last-minute doctor’s appointment today and I will see what they say. So last Sunday I went to the emergency room because I have been throwing up bile for hours every day for awhile. They couldn’t find anything wrong and said it was a stomach bug. Well 4 days later and I am still vomiting bile every day. Something here is not right. Something here is very wrong. This is not a stomach bug. So back to the doctor I go.

Allowance, Friends, Her Future

Angelica has been doing work to earn an allowance lately. Fundamentally she has to have a perfectly clean room at the end of the night. If she does, she earns a quarter. This morning she is earning an extra quarter by bringing a load of her father’s clean clothes upstairs. Naturally she has to take more than one trip. I appreciate it because getting up and down the stairs is a lot and the fewer times I do it a day the better. She is really enjoying earning money for different things.

Neighborhood kids have been coming over to play constantly. It gives me joy to see her play with other kids and have so much to look forward to! Lately our home has been fun central with kids circulating through. Sometimes one of the girls is here for hours. Angelica is so happy!

Academically Angelica has really been blossoming. Her love for science bodes well for her academic future. She wants to go through the books we have. She also loves to watch video clips about a variety of subjects. YouTube kids is a great way for her to learn and see different things. I really like that app. It’s great for parents because you can add what channels you allow your child to watch.

I really wonder what Angelica will be someday. Will she be a scientist? Storm chaser? Video producer? There are so many things that she could be. It’s fascinating to watch her bloom. That’s the thing with kids. If you plant a rose bush you know you’re going to get roses. When you make a baby you have no idea what you’re getting. What is my daughter becoming? Whatever it is I can’t wait to see. She might be a hairdresser or an artist or own a grocery store. She can do anything. It’s all dependent on her aptitude, interest, and work ethic. This is one of the joys of being a mother. Giving your child the resources and then allowing them to become what they are meant to be.

New Cleaner, Close Call, Horror Story

We are looking for a new house cleaner. I hopefully have someone coming to interview today. We’ll see how it goes. I don’t want to go much longer without someone to clean. Obviously, I clean too. But I definitely need someone to come on a regular basis and do cleaning.

I have been sick. I have been vomiting bile for hours every day for several days. I finally went to an emergency room to make sure that everything was okay and that I didn’t have a recurrence of a medical problem I have had before. They took a CT scan and said that everything was good. They gave me some medicine for nausea, and I’ve been taking that for 2 days. It helps a lot more than it did when I was pregnant. They also told me that I have a cyst on an ovary that probably needs to be fixed. Sometime this week I will call a gynecologist. I just really don’t feel like it. I don’t want to go into one. So if it’s not too big I will probably just let it burst. It hurt like hell the last time that happened to me but at least I didn’t have to go in for one of those god-awful exams. It’s just important to make sure that the cyst is not above a certain size because if it is you can have a lot of internal bleeding when it ruptures. I am just beyond grateful it wasn’t the problem I was afraid it was.

It must be a stomach bug, but this is a very unusual and long-lasting stomach bug.

I have been doing some writing but not as much as I would like. On a bright note, I have begun writing horror (what a weird sentence). I’ve been talking about it for ages, but I put fingers to keyboard and I started a story. I have the beginning how I want it, although as usual I will have to revise 50 more times. I just not sure how I want it to end. I’m not sure where I want to take it. And I have a second story in the works.

Lovely Day

Angelica and I had a great morning. I got some housework done while she played. Then we went on a playdate with some friends to Chik fil A.

Right now she is watching Minions. Soon, we’ll go grocery shopping.

I want to do whatever I can to make the most of the rest of June and then July. She will be starting school before I know it. I can hardly fathom just how much I will miss her. It wells up in my mind sometimes and I have to think of something else or I will cry. These years before a child is school age are absolutely precious.

We were planning to homeschool, as I have written before. But for now we have decided to send her to school. She will love it. I will cry. But I am happy for her. I want her to make friends and build good memories.

Today I was told that there is actually an amusement park around here. There’s one near Colorado Springs that’s a winter-themed one, and then there’s one up in Denver that’s kind of like a Six Flags. If Craig has a weekend day that he wants to take to do that it would probably be a lot of fun for Angelica. I’ve become a boring old lady. A lot of rides make me really sick or give me headaches. Because of that, I don’t really want to take her by myself because at her age there’s probably a lot of rides that she’ll need me for and I’m not much use. When my husband and I were dating he wanted to ride the same rollercoaster repeatedly. There was no line, somehow, so we got to go on Apollo’s Chariot a bunch of times. And then… I threw up all over him. We got off the ride and were walking around the park and I felt queasy. And then I just threw up everywhere. I threw up on him. I threw up on myself and the ground and the restroom building. Everything. I swear that if it was in a 10 Mi radius I threw up on it.

I want to make sure she gets swimming lessons this summer too. I haven’t wanted her to take lessons in the winter because it does get rather cold here and I remember what it’s like to come out of the pool and put your clothes on and go out into the cold air. Maybe I’m sissy but that wasn’t fun to me and I don’t see the necessity of her doing it. We don’t live by the ocean anymore so learning to swim is not as urgent. However, it is still important and I think once she gets past fear so really enjoy it. In future summers I would love to just be able to take her to the pool in the afternoon and let her play. There are lessons on base but from what everyone says, and from what our experience was this past spring, the classes fill up within an hour or two of opening. It’s hard to catch that. There’s another swimming place around here for kids that I’m going to look into. I’m also going to look into private instruction. She really does need to learn and I hope I can get that done in July.

Oral Surgery

Food is amazing. I love the sweetness, the saltiness, the spice. The smoothness and chunkiness. The savory flavor of the meat. But for the next few days I can eat none of it. I had oral surgery this morning.

I have to get a tooth implant because of the emergency extraction I had back in February. This is part one of that. THEY DRILLED AND SCREWED A SCREW INTO MY JAWBONE. Let that sink in.

Insurance wouldn’t pay for anesthetic. There was no way in hell I was going through it without anesthesthetic.

Bleeding is not too bad, but they told me at the office that the pain gets worse. It peaks days 3 though 5. I have had an extremely hard week, and this has not been a good way to end it.

No matter how many surgeries I have, even the ankle fusions and replacements in my future which terrify me with their pain and long layups, I am grateful to be here. Life is so sweet, but I live on its edge and my balance is precarious.

Shy, Parsnip, Mother’s Day

I feel so private, so shy. Earlier in the week I submitted to two magazines. I hadn’t done that in a long time. There is a poet group I want to join, but I can’t even fill out the paperwork. Putting myself out there feels exhausting and violating – especially because they talk about giving readings and things like that. I have never been an extravert. In fact, I have been very introverted my whole life. The older I get, the worse it gets. There is a group of horror writers I want to get plugged into. I am excited about it, as I really love reading horror, have supernatural experiences at home, and I want to write fiction.

The thought of going to a meeting sucks my spine out of me.

Forcing myself to go would be good for me. I would love to find inspiration and meet like minded people. Being there would probably be spectacular. The thought of going gives me butterflies. Not even butterflies. It gives me moths.

Parsnip has a new enclosure that Craig built for him. It is in the library, which gives him more sun than he got in the laundry room. There are plenty of pros and cons for parsnip. He is now enclosed in a much smaller space. It’s more fun and definitely cozier, but it’s smaller. When he was in the laundry room he got to go out and run around the house a lot more. He was shut into the laundry room while we were sleeping or when I had to go to a store, but he spent a lot of hours a day running around the house. Now he doesn’t. This us partially to minimize possible future damage to the house. My little bunny has already caused trouble. Part of it is because this new enclosure doesn’t have a way to open the gate. He has to be put into his enclosure from the top. So if we let him out to run around the house and we aren’t available to really really watch him and follow him he could run into trouble. If he needs to eat, drink, or use his litter box he can’t get to it. So he can only come out of the enclosure at certain times. It was possible to make an enclosure that would allow him to get into it, but then it wouldn’t be secure enough to keep him from getting out of it. Parsnip is a fuzzy genius. Craig actually stapled the walls of the pen to the plywood.

We took Angelica out front on her skates. She doesn’t yet know how to skate per se, but she walked in the skates. Her balance was amazing – especially considering we haven’t been teaching her. We need to take her to a rink.

Mother’s Day was lovely. Good food, good gifts, good time. My daughter picked out a pretty watch for me. Craig got me two pieces of art from a local gallery, and another gift that I am not sure where he got it. We grabbed lunch at that cute little French place. I feel cherished

Getting Better

On the rise. Physically and mentally I am improving. I am sitting down while Angelica gets tutoring.

Craig is liking his new job and I am so happy for him. I miss him though. He is already working late hours, and he is on week one of training with his predecessor. His previous schedule constantly rotated between days, swings, and mids during the week, so he was exhausted. That schedule was awful for him and I am glad he’s done with it. However, the one advantage of that job was that we had a ton of family time. We really loved that, especially since he was just coming off a sea tour.

I doubt we will ever have family time like that again.

It is May 9th and it has been snowing today. Nothing that sticks this time, but still – it’s mid May.

Soon I will be taking Angelica on a mommy daughter date. She misses them. It has been a month now. She is going on a daddy daughter date this weekend.

I am in a state of bliss listening to lectures on Great Courses. I am diving into linguistics, natural history (dinosaurs and terror birds!!!), and dystopian and utopian fiction. It is the intellectual joy of college without the expense of actually getting another degree. I do take notes sometimes though. I can’t help myself.